Dear Anni,
One night when I was about 22 and sound asleep, I felt an unmistakable evil spirit/presence around me that was trying to enter my mind and body. (The sensation felt exactly like what I've learned many years later: It is the feeling of "vibrating in the spirit" as the "signs and wonders" Charismatics report, which is indistinguishable from the sensation of transchanneling and astral projection, from what I've heard). I was only partially awakened by the assault. Then I realized that I was fully awake because I could hear the unmistakable sound of traffic on a not-too distant freeway and I clearly realized that I was lying flat on my bed face down. I still felt the spirit presence and was absolutely terrified and paralyzed with fear. I couldn't move a muscle but one of my arms (the left or right one, I don't recall) was moving across the bed all by itself and I could hear a distinct growling sound in my mind. It was obviously growling at me. Just to be clear: to growl means "to utter a deep guttural sound of anger or hostility." I don't recall if this demonic attack stopped by itself or if I prayed for God's intervention but I do remember that it was fairly early in the morning and that I waited several hours before I phoned my Bible-believing brother Bob to tell him what happened.
I had many more encounters after that. It was always the same vibrating sensation, a feeling of an entity trying to enter my mind, and I would always be overwhelmed with the same terrifying, paralyzing fear. Routinely, as soon as this would begin to happen, I would quickly pray "help me God" for God to rescue me and in my mind it felt like a window was closing (not instantly but fairly quickly) and that the entity was prevented from entering. A few years later I told my older unbelieving brother Richard about this and he explained it as a misfiring of neurons in my brain. I certainly didn't believe Richard for a second but since he had a PhD in electrical engineering and probably read or had a scientific basis for his opinion, I decided to perform an experiment.
In my next encounter, I would again be awakened by a spirit attempting to force its way into my mind to control me. This time, I didn't start praying immediately and the frightening sensation of what I interpreted as a demonic intrusion continued. I never waited too many seconds but as soon as I would pray, that feeling of a window quickly closing and shutting out the evil influence would follow immediately. I don't recall how many times that I would pause before praying. The first test was persuasive enough. It was always the prayers whenever they were given that quickly ended the attacks. I was satisfied with my proof that my experiences had nothing to do with the neurons of my brain misfiring.
In 1988, I moved to Texas for graduate school at the University of Texas at Dallas. I wanted to study relativity with Wolfgang Rindler (a very prominent physicist). That's where I met Grace. We were both teaching assistants in the math department and shared an office together. It was probably January 1989, about a month after one of God's angels reproved me in a dream, that I had yet another demonic visit. It was the same kind of terrifying episode except this time when I awoke, a very angry and growling voice spoke very distinctly and slowly to my mind, saying, "I H-A-T-E Y-O-U." I was a little frightened and very surprised but I was mostly amused by the thought that Satan couldn't control his great anger toward me.
I never heard the devil speak to me again. He would still attempt to intrude into my mind on occasions but I got so accustomed to what that felt like that I could just pray to God while still asleep and I wouldn't even be provoked enough to wake up.
These attacks stopped altogether about 7 years ago. I was napping on the couch and sensed an evil presence in the room. Still asleep, I prayed to God. This time I wanted the devil punished. I was trying to wake up but was unable to. Still in my dream state, and wanting to wake up to see what was threatening me, I then dreamed that I saw a small, shadowy, impish, evil-looking figure cowering in fear at the back wall across the room. It dissolved before my eyes. I felt that I would never be troubled by a visit from the devil again.
